drumdude wrote: ↑Thu Nov 11, 2021 9:29 pm
I've been watching recent stake conferences on youtube. There's not really anything noteworthy in them, unfortunately. Most of the speakers at the end of the meeting, the highest priesthood holders, have only one thing to say. That being in the church offers unique blessings that you can get no other way.
Is this true for you who have left Mormonism? Have you lost your blessings? Has your life gotten harder, has the joy been removed?
Last Sunday, I went to church. Nowadays, I probably attend maybe twice a year for baby blessings, mission farewells, baptisms, etc. Last Sunday, it was because my dad had been called to the bishopric.
I always enjoy time with my parents. As they’ve been aging, the extra moments I can steal have gained greater meaning and preciousness to me. As unpleasant as it was having my back tortured in one of the metal anti-lumbar chairs (an extra pleasure since my discectomy); being next to my mom and dad was nice.
I genuinely felt sad the whole time (and still do) for my dad being wrangled to do this. Prior to retirement, his job had him on-call 24/7. He could be gone days at a time, and after he had been home for about 9-10 hours, he was considered “rested” and could be called out again. Prior to his retirement a few years ago, holidays were rarely celebrated on their conventional day. Sometimes Christmas presents would be opened a day or two late. Thanksgiving dinner was rarely had on Thanksgiving, and a few times was a Thanksgiving breakfast. Family vacations that included him were an extra rare treat, as my dad had to put in time-off requests usually a year or more in advance to ensure he got them. Even then though, he could get bumped by someone with more seniority.
He missed the baby blessings of about half his grandkids. Countless birthdays, performances, games, awards, and on and on of his children and grandchildren were missed because of the sacrifices he had to make to financial provide for our family. Often, when he would make it to events, you could see just how incredibly tired he was, because him attending usually meant him sacrificing some sleep.
Then, he retired. Thanksgiving dinner started happening on Thanksgiving. Birthdays, Christmas, Halloween, award ceremonies… Dad/Grandpa was there. I got to take my dad on a road trip (just the two of us) up through the Sierra Nevadas, and California. The trip was 5 days, which is the longest time he and I had ever spent together.
My parents had made plans a few weeks ago to spend last weekend on a mini-vacation to Arizona with my sister and her little fam. They had to cancel, so that my dad could be at church to be set apart.
My wife (catholic-to-Mormon-convert-to-atheist) was so confused when she found out, and asked “Why didn’t he just say no?” She never understood the whole “callings come from divine inspiration” component of Mormonism.
I will never (again) have to make a choice between Church, and my family/life. My dad, who was finally free to fully enjoy family and retirement, is now unable to be afforded that.
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