A Celestial Holocaust for Midgley?

[Doctor Scratch]

My dear friends and colleagues:

I hope you are all doing well. Summer is winding down and we are heading into the fall semester. It’s an exciting time. But it’s also a time for bright new ideas, or for exhuming old, hoary ones. And that’s where I am at the moment. I find myself thinking about the fundamentals of Mopologetics, and the vitality of the movement. I’m also thinking about the seasons, and about change.

What concerns me at the moment, though , is this: what are the Mopologists’ ideas about heaven? This may very well be the fundamental question in Mopologetics studies right now. We have “Added Upon.” But what do the Mopologist *hope for*? It is, I’m convinced, a critical question.

Consider: if DCP becomes a God, will he have Bordeaux in heaven? Will he permit himself to at last understand the long-extolled beverage’s appeal? Will he grant himself a harem of Jennifer Lopez clones?

And what about Louis Midgley, who is so fond of “going to take a look” at Holocaust sites? This raises a very important—and very troubling—question: Does LDS theology permit deliberate Holocausts? That is: if Midgley becomes a god and for the sake of amusement decides to send people “up the stack”…. This is 100% allowable per LDS doctrine, is it not? Why do we have any reason to believe that Midgley or DCP or any of the other Mopologists would be “good” deities? Midgley has spoken many times of mortal life as a “probation,” meaning, I guess, that the “real” fun is yet to come.

Given how horrific things have been in *this* life, can you imagine Midgley as a God? Seriously: what would it be like to pray to Heavenly Father knowing that your Father in Heaven is an exalted Midgley? Is this really the future that Mormonism is holding out for us?

[drumdude]

All kidding aside, do Mormons really contemplate having their own planet and being Gods all that much? Yes it's doctrine, but do they actually look forward to that?

I think they are much more similar to regular old Christians than they'd like to admit. And when the rubber hits the road they think Heaven is just being in God's presence.

[Moksha]

I remember members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints talk of getting their own planet as a selling point and something they relished. Of course, they saw themselves as being benevolent Gods. I suspect this is still wished for, but with the new caveats, they know better than to speak of it openly. They realize that non-Saints would scoff at them ruling their own planets. Apologists would even feel a need to deny this former bright spot for their fellow Saints.

Midgley Planet would have an extensive list of dos and donts. The faithful would probably have to mark their lintels with tapir blood every century to be passed over.

[Philo Sofee]

Just imagining the idea of Midgley as a god, even in potentia, makes me think the Mormon doctrine is flawed, deeply so.

[IHAQ]

All kidding aside, do Mormons really contemplate having their own planet and being Gods all that much? Yes it's doctrine, but do they actually look forward to that?

I think they are much more similar to regular old Christians than they'd like to admit. And when the rubber hits the road they think Heaven is just being in God's presence.

Most of the Mormons I know don't really contemplate the hereafter in any other context beyond not losing their kids/family. That's as far as it goes for them. That they will be with their kids and that things will be "better". Whatever that means. God's presence in all of that is entirely secondary. They would rather have their kids than God. There are others for whom living without their less than valiant kids is a price worth paying to live eternally in God's presence. Those are they who would be prepared to be suicide bombers for the Church if the Prophet required it. There are yet others that refuse to contemplate such a dichotomy, even though that will be the situation for every single family if Mormonism has explained what happens accurately.

The reality is that there are as many versions of the hereafter as there are members. And the Church does nothing to end the ambiguity and explain exactly the situation that will exist once we are dead.

As for Midgley in the hereafter...I hope he enjoys being prodded with a hot poker...

[Doctor Scratch]

Just imagining the idea of Midgley as a god, even in potentia, makes me think the Mormon doctrine is flawed, deeply so.

Indeed. And here's another bit of food for thought...The current Heavenly Father--Elohim--that the Mopologists worship and give 10% of their income to, created a world in which atheism (and "avowedly athetheistic regimes") have been permitted to flourish. Will this also happen when the Mopologists become Gods? Will DCP permit a universe where atheistic regimes commit mass slaughter on a scale that is greater than that of religiously-oriented regimes, just so one of his loud-mouthed and pinheaded worshippers can score rhetorical points against an alternative universe Gemli?

[dastardly stem]

God as has been traditionally defined is nothing but a deified Midgley. I'm not following the controversy here. Would Midgley endorse the murder and rape of millions? Would he too look forward to the day when he tells many fawning believers in him, that he never knew them? The Jesus myth made Midgley who he is as he's strived to live the Jesus life. He can't help that. And it's not his fault he's done it better than most others. That's supposed to be his virtue, given the religion of Christianity. in a sense the poor guy's just a victim.

[Philo Sofee]

Just imagining the idea of Midgley as a god, even in potentia, makes me think the Mormon doctrine is flawed, deeply so.

Indeed. And here's another bit of food for thought...The current Heavenly Father--Elohim--that the Mopologists worship and give 10% of their income to, created a world in which atheism (and "avowedly athetheistic regimes") have been permitted to flourish. Will this also happen when the Mopologists become Gods? Will DCP permit a universe where atheistic regimes commit mass slaughter on a scale that is greater than that of religiously-oriented regimes, just so one of his loud-mouthed and pinheaded worshippers can score rhetorical points against an alternative universe Gemli?

HA! Indeed! A most succulent point to ponderize... Terrific insight Dr. Scratch.

[Philo Sofee]

God as has been traditionally defined is nothing but a deified Midgley. I'm not following the controversy here. Would Midgley endorse the murder and rape of millions? Would he too look forward to the day when he tells many fawning believers in him, that he never knew them? The Jesus myth made Midgley who he is as he's strived to live the Jesus life. He can't help that. And it's not his fault he's done it better than most others. That's supposed to be his virtue, given the religion of Christianity. in a sense the poor guy's just a victim.

Agreed. But see? On the bright side, ElohimMidgley will be able to rectify his victimhood into Omnipotent power for all to genuflect and worship him, and I have a hard time even seeing his Midgleyholiness getting upset about Rosary beads either. Hey, it's worship! Worship Thou ME!, will be his motto, how they do so probably own't affect him much...

[drumdude]

Just imagining the idea of Midgley as a god, even in potentia, makes me think the Mormon doctrine is flawed, deeply so.

Indeed. And here's another bit of food for thought...The current Heavenly Father--Elohim--that the Mopologists worship and give 10% of their income to, created a world in which atheism (and "avowedly athetheistic regimes") have been permitted to flourish. Will this also happen when the Mopologists become Gods? Will DCP permit a universe where atheistic regimes commit mass slaughter on a scale that is greater than that of religiously-oriented regimes, just so one of his loud-mouthed and pinheaded worshippers can score rhetorical points against an alternative universe Gemli?

It's a beautiful work, and a wonder.