Bigfoot Is Chased Out Of The Lai Temple With A Light Saber

[Everybody Wang Chung]

Joseph Fielding Smith's brother was serving as a mission president in Hawaii when he had his own encounter with Bigfoot a.k.a. Cain.

According to Matthew Bowman's article published in the Journal of Mormon History, "A Mormon Bigfoot: David Patten’s Cain and the Concept of Evil in LDS Folklore," the night before the Laie Hawaii Temple was dedicated in 1921, the brother of Prophet Joseph F. Smith experienced the following events:

"A man came through the door. He was tall enough to have to stoop to enter. His eyes were very protruding and rather wild looking, his fingernails were thick and long. He presented a rather unkempt appearance and wore no clothing at all. . . . There suddenly appeared in [Smith’s] right hand a light which had the size and appearance of a dagger. . . .He commanded the person in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ to depart. . . . Immediately when the light appeared the person stopped and on being commanded to leave, he backed out the door" ("Experiences with Cain,” n.d., MSS 5273, Archives, Family and Church History Department, Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Salt Lake City (hereafter LDS Church Archives).

Thoroughly disturbed by the encounter, E. Wesley wrote to his brother Joseph Fielding Smith, about his experience. According to Matthew Bowman's article, Joseph Fielding Smith wrote to his brother that the strange visitor was "Cain whose curse is to roam the earth seeking whom he may destroy.”

https://www.ldsliving.com/when-cain-app ... le/s/83424

A Close Approximation Of The Events On That Fateful Night In 1921:

[Philo Sofee]

LOL! Gawd I love these faith promoting rumors!

[Rivendale]

What is next Deer Jesus?

[Alphus and Omegus]

Bigfoot Cain is the absolutely most hilarious part of Mormonism. I still laugh at myself for actually believing these legends. Spence Kimball did at least one good thing in his life by raising awareness of it in his awful book, The Miracle of Forgiveness.

[Father Francis]

The interwebs are way ahead of you.

[Moksha]

Spencer W. Kimball as a young man was driving from Malad, Idaho to Logan, Utah when his car started to sputter. It finally rolled to a stop in what looked like the middle of nowhere. “What a predicament”, thought Spencer, “If I had only topped the tank off before I left Malad”. He wisely decided it was no use crying over an empty tank. He sat for a while and pondered what Brigham Young or Golden H. Kimball would do. Finally, he shrugged and decided that swearing up a storm would not help.

Suddenly a glint of light caught his eye. In the middle of nowhere, there was a wooded grove. Maybe it's sacred he thought, but I will check it out anyway. Young Spencer threw his suit coat over his shoulder and began the march up a small trail to the woods. As he got closer, he could feel the beat of the music. It was strange music, not like the hymns in Church. No, this definitely different – there were drums and other strange instruments and singing. Not like any singing he had heard the choir sing. He kept getting closer to what appeared to be a cabin. He could make out a few words that they were singing, but it was gibberish to him. What could “glitter on the highway” possibly mean? He wondered if this might be a cabin full of Swedes or Italians.

He noticed a small sign posted on the trail to the cabin. It read Love Shack. “Lordy, lordy,” he thought, “What have I got myself into?” But there was no turning back. He needed gas and was forced to steel his resolve to guard himself against whatever malefic influence a love shack could possess. Spencer pressed forward and as he was nearing the steps it came to him that the music could not be from Idaho or even this world. Should he run or should he be an Ironrod of the Lord? He decided to knock on the door.

The music suddenly stopped and sounded like the old Victrola needle skipping across one of those records like they had down at Hawley’s Feed and Grain back in Malad. The door swung open and a pretty redhead with a big hairdo, the likes of which he had never seen before, called out to him. “How you doing sugar? What can we help you with today?” Before he could answer she grabbed his arm and pulled him inside. “Do you dance? Well, of course, you do sugar.” He looked around and saw a room full of people smiling at him. It looked friendly enough, but before he could even mention gas, his eyes fixed upon a personage covered with hair. Spencer just stared. Sensing Spencer’s anxiety, the hairy personage got up and walked over to introduce himself. Sputtering noises were emanating from Spencer. “What hath God wrought”, Spencer thought.

The hairy person was huge, perhaps seven feet tall, and thinking about feet, Spencer realized that the person had the largest feet he had ever seen or hoped to see. Spencer needed to do something. Spencer shouted, “I rebuke you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by virtue of the holy Melchizedek priesthood, and I command you to go hence, and immediately depart from my sight…"

Everybody’s mouth fell open. Had they let a lunatic inside? What was he shouting about? But before they could ask, Spencer was out the door running. He ran all the way back to the Oldsmobile. He cranked the engine and it started. When he got in he noticed the tank read half full. He did not think about it. He drove as fast as he could to Logan and thanked the Good Lord for delivering him from the enormous hands of whatever that hairy person could have been.

Spencer later went on to have a career in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and he always remembered his brush with that Big Footed character and how the power of the priesthood saved him.

And now you know the rest of the miracle.

[Everybody Wang Chung]

Spencer W. Kimball as a young man was driving from Malad, Idaho to Logan, Utah when his car started to sputter. It finally rolled to a stop in what looked like the middle of nowhere. “What a predicament”, thought Spencer, “If I had only topped the tank off before I left Malad”. He wisely decided it was no use crying over an empty tank. He sat for a while and pondered what Brigham Young or Golden H. Kimball would do. Finally, he shrugged and decided that swearing up a storm would not help.

Suddenly a glint of light caught his eye. In the middle of nowhere, there was a wooded grove. Maybe it's sacred he thought, but I will check it out anyway. Young Spencer threw his suit coat over his shoulder and began the march up a small trail to the woods. As he got closer, he could feel the beat of the music. It was strange music, not like the hymns in Church. No, this definitely different – there were drums and other strange instruments and singing. Not like any singing he had heard the choir sing. He kept getting closer to what appeared to be a cabin. He could make out a few words that they were singing, but it was gibberish to him. What could “glitter on the highway” possibly mean? He wondered if this might be a cabin full of Swedes or Italians.

He noticed a small sign posted on the trail to the cabin. It read Love Shack. “Lordy, lordy,” he thought, “What have I got myself into?” But there was no turning back. He needed gas and was forced to steel his resolve to guard himself against whatever malefic influence a love shack could possess. Spencer pressed forward and as he was nearing the steps it came to him that the music could not be from Idaho or even this world. Should he run or should he be an Ironrod of the Lord? He decided to knock on the door.

The music suddenly stopped and sounded like the old Victrola needle skipping across one of those records like they had down at Hawley’s Feed and Grain back in Malad. The door swung open and a pretty redhead with a big hairdo, the likes of which he had never seen before, called out to him. “How you doing sugar? What can we help you with today?” Before he could answer she grabbed his arm and pulled him inside. “Do you dance? Well, of course, you do sugar.” He looked around and saw a room full of people smiling at him. It looked friendly enough, but before he could even mention gas, his eyes fixed upon a personage covered with hair. Spencer just stared. Sensing Spencer’s anxiety, the hairy personage got up and walked over to introduce himself. Sputtering noises were emanating from Spencer. “What hath God wrought”, Spencer thought.

The hairy person was huge, perhaps seven feet tall, and thinking about feet, Spencer realized that the person had the largest feet he had ever seen or hoped to see. Spencer needed to do something. Spencer shouted, “I rebuke you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by virtue of the holy Melchizedek priesthood, and I command you to go hence, and immediately depart from my sight…"

Everybody’s mouth fell open. Had they let a lunatic inside? What was he shouting about? But before they could ask, Spencer was out the door running. He ran all the way back to the Oldsmobile. He cranked the engine and it started. When he got in he noticed the tank read half full. He did not think about it. He drove as fast as he could to Logan and thanked the Good Lord for delivering him from the enormous hands of whatever that hairy person could have been.

Spencer later went on to have a career in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and he always remembered his brush with that Big Footed character and how the power of the priesthood saved him.

And now you know the rest of the miracle.

Oh my goodness!! That was funny!

[Dr Exiled]

Great story Moksha. Also, there will always be a special place in my heart for big foot and deer Jesus.

[Everybody Wang Chung]

Good news! It looks like Cain might finally be settling down:

https://weeklyworldnews.com/headlines/1 ... g-bigfoot/

[Philo Sofee]

Spencer W. Kimball as a young man was driving from Malad, Idaho to Logan, Utah when his car started to sputter. It finally rolled to a stop in what looked like the middle of nowhere. “What a predicament”, thought Spencer, “If I had only topped the tank off before I left Malad”. He wisely decided it was no use crying over an empty tank. He sat for a while and pondered what Brigham Young or Golden H. Kimball would do. Finally, he shrugged and decided that swearing up a storm would not help.

Suddenly a glint of light caught his eye. In the middle of nowhere, there was a wooded grove. Maybe it's sacred he thought, but I will check it out anyway. Young Spencer threw his suit coat over his shoulder and began the march up a small trail to the woods. As he got closer, he could feel the beat of the music. It was strange music, not like the hymns in Church. No, this definitely different – there were drums and other strange instruments and singing. Not like any singing he had heard the choir sing. He kept getting closer to what appeared to be a cabin. He could make out a few words that they were singing, but it was gibberish to him. What could “glitter on the highway” possibly mean? He wondered if this might be a cabin full of Swedes or Italians.

He noticed a small sign posted on the trail to the cabin. It read Love Shack. “Lordy, lordy,” he thought, “What have I got myself into?” But there was no turning back. He needed gas and was forced to steel his resolve to guard himself against whatever malefic influence a love shack could possess. Spencer pressed forward and as he was nearing the steps it came to him that the music could not be from Idaho or even this world. Should he run or should he be an Ironrod of the Lord? He decided to knock on the door.

The music suddenly stopped and sounded like the old Victrola needle skipping across one of those records like they had down at Hawley’s Feed and Grain back in Malad. The door swung open and a pretty redhead with a big hairdo, the likes of which he had never seen before, called out to him. “How you doing sugar? What can we help you with today?” Before he could answer she grabbed his arm and pulled him inside. “Do you dance? Well, of course, you do sugar.” He looked around and saw a room full of people smiling at him. It looked friendly enough, but before he could even mention gas, his eyes fixed upon a personage covered with hair. Spencer just stared. Sensing Spencer’s anxiety, the hairy personage got up and walked over to introduce himself. Sputtering noises were emanating from Spencer. “What hath God wrought”, Spencer thought.

The hairy person was huge, perhaps seven feet tall, and thinking about feet, Spencer realized that the person had the largest feet he had ever seen or hoped to see. Spencer needed to do something. Spencer shouted, “I rebuke you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by virtue of the holy Melchizedek priesthood, and I command you to go hence, and immediately depart from my sight…"

Everybody’s mouth fell open. Had they let a lunatic inside? What was he shouting about? But before they could ask, Spencer was out the door running. He ran all the way back to the Oldsmobile. He cranked the engine and it started. When he got in he noticed the tank read half full. He did not think about it. He drove as fast as he could to Logan and thanked the Good Lord for delivering him from the enormous hands of whatever that hairy person could have been.

Spencer later went on to have a career in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and he always remembered his brush with that Big Footed character and how the power of the priesthood saved him.

And now you know the rest of the miracle.

I...................can't.....................stop.....................LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!!! .................TEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gawd I ***LOVE*** YOU PENGUIN!!!!!!!
This made my entire week!