President Nelson demotes Dieter Uchtdorf from the First Presidency after Uchtdorf devotes the entirety of his October 2017 general conference address to systematically taking apart Nelson’s oft-told miraculous diving-airplane story.
Nelson announces that elders quorums and high priest groups will henceforth swap meetinghouse rooms so that the elders quorum “gets to sit in the soft seats for once.”
Nelson axes home and visiting teaching in favor of the Old Testament-based practice of stoning congregation members who are lazy learners and lax disciples.
Nelson issues new guidelines for youth interviews that recognize the God-given right of youth to refuse to answer questions from bishops without a lawyer present.
Nelson announces that the church is dropping the Boy Scouts program but warns church members to stay out of the “woke” Girl Scouts program.
In a surprising move, Nelson announces that missions are optional for young men and women, admitting, for the first time, that “I sure as hell didn’t serve one and neither did my counselors in the First Presidency.”
Citing a recent court decision, Nelson announces that youth ages 8 and older are immediately eligible for advancement from Primary to Young Women and Young Men. He quickly adds that the church is appealing the decision and that such youth are perfectly free to take a “gap year” before advancement if they so choose.
Nelson announces that sister missionaries can now wear modest culottes and capri pants, but they “must be made by ZCMI, consistent with an inspired 1875 letter from the First Presidency and the Twelve.”
2019
Nelson announces that young missionaries can communicate with family each week, but he asks that calls be limited to 60 seconds or less each to avoid running up the church’s “outrageously expensive monthly phone bill.”
Wendy Nelson reveals that her husband reaches for a lighted pen and a notebook when he receives revelations during the overnight hours. She admits that Nelson usually tells her to “go to the kitchen and make a large batch of homemade doughnuts and I’ll tell you later what I learned tonight.”
Nelson announces that couples who are civilly married can be sealed in the temple immediately thereafter but must be accompanied at all times by same-gender chaperones until the sealing is complete.
Nelson announces that women can serve as sealing and baptismal witnesses. Asked by a Deseret News reporter to comment on the landmark change, Nelson replies, “Aw hell, anyone breathing 8 or older who has been baptized and can see worth a lick can be a witness.”
Nelson announces that 2020 will be a “bicentennial year” with April 2020 general conference “different from any previous conference.”
2020
Nelson fails to wake up during the night in early 2020 when God tries to tell him that a worldwide pandemic is coming.
Nelson issues a new proclamation about some Gospel topic at the “memorable and unforgettable” April 2020 general conference attended by no regular church members.
Church members immediately forget that Nelson issued a new proclamation at the April 2020 general conference. (In fact, as of September 30, 2025, not a single Deznatter has demanded that the proclamation be canonized at general conference and made the topic of a temple recommend question.)
Church leaders announce that the Ensign magazine has been renamed The Thinking Has Been Done.
2021
Church leaders announce that the Minerva Teichert murals in Manti Temple will be “ripped from the temple walls. burned, and buried in a big ol’ hole.”
Admitting that they “gave a half-hearted prayer and failed to remain on their knees listening for an answer” and that they “received thousands of emails from ‘T.O.ed members,” church leaders announce that the murals in the Manti Temple will be moved to decorate the walls of the Provo Temple.
Church leaders announce that the Saturday evening session of general conference will be discontinued because “all sessions of general conference are now available to anyone who desires to watch or listen.”
Church leaders announce that the Saturday evening session of general conference will continue because “after additional study and prayer, we have felt impressed to continue to hold the Saturday evening session of general conference, albeit in a different format than in the past” and “the reason we gave last month was irrelevant.”
Nelson announces that the Provo Temple will be demolished and replaced with a temple featuring a “classical design.” (He does not comment on the fate of the Teichert murals recently moved from the Manti Temple to the walls of the Provo Temple.
Church leaders announce that “tithing settlement” has been renamed “tithing pay-up and shakedown.”
2023
Explaining that they have better things to do than micromanaging every single ward and stake creation and boundary adjustment, Church leaders announce that stake leaders can “use any flipping numbers they feel like in splitting and creating wards and stakes.”
2024
The LDS Church and the Community of Christ announce that they have reached an agreement in which the LDS Church will receive the Kirtland Temple in exchange for Dieter Uchtdorf, City Creek Mall, and cash.
Nelson announces that Snoop Dogg is the new voice of “Music and the Spoken Word.”
Church leaders authorize wearing of “Immodest is Hottest” temple garments.
2025
Church leaders announce that the Addiction Recovery Program renamed Healing through the Savior: The Addiction Recovery Program of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints: A Thirty-Step Program Requiring Absolution by Bishops and Commitment of Miracle of Forgiveness to Memory.
Church announces that the Provo Missionary Training Center’s cafeteria food will be reformulated to be 100 percent free of saltpeter.
"I'm on paid sabbatical from BYU in exchange for my promise to use this time to finish two books."
Keeping the LDS Church from being officially loony regarding vaccinations and immigration.
That is all.
"He disturbs the laws of his country, he forces himself upon women, and he puts men to death without trial.” ~Otanes on the monarch, Herodotus Histories 3.80.
Keeping the LDS Church from being officially loony regarding vaccinations and immigration.
That is all.
I'll add just a few more:
Announced over 200 new temples and accelerated the pace of temple construction and accessibility.
Home centered church using Come Follow Me program and the two-hour block.
Greater focus on Jesus Christ.
Promoting racial understanding and outreach, including a partnership and substantial donation to the NAACP.
Annual summaries of Church humanitarian efforts became standard, and global initiatives to support women and children were launched under his direction.
Consolidated and restructured priesthood quorums and organizations for both adults and children.
Women were given more active roles in the church, such as serving as official witnesses for baptisms and temple sealings, signifying a notable administrative and cultural shift towards gender inclusivity.
Setting a global standard allowing civil marriage followed by temple sealing without a mandatory waiting period.
President Nelson demotes Dieter Uchtdorf from the First Presidency after Uchtdorf devotes the entirety of his October 2017 general conference address to systematically taking apart Nelson’s oft-told miraculous diving-airplane story.
Nelson announces that elders quorums and high priest groups will henceforth swap meetinghouse rooms so that the elders quorum “gets to sit in the soft seats for once.”
Nelson axes home and visiting teaching in favor of the Old Testament-based practice of stoning congregation members who are lazy learners and lax disciples.
Nelson issues new guidelines for youth interviews that recognize the God-given right of youth to refuse to answer questions from bishops without a lawyer present.
Nelson announces that the church is dropping the Boy Scouts program but warns church members to stay out of the “woke” Girl Scouts program.
In a surprising move, Nelson announces that missions are optional for young men and women, admitting, for the first time, that “I sure as hell didn’t serve one and neither did my counselors in the First Presidency.”
Citing a recent court decision, Nelson announces that youth ages 8 and older are immediately eligible for advancement from Primary to Young Women and Young Men. He quickly adds that the church is appealing the decision and that such youth are perfectly free to take a “gap year” before advancement if they so choose.
Nelson announces that sister missionaries can now wear modest culottes and capri pants, but they “must be made by ZCMI, consistent with an inspired 1875 letter from the First Presidency and the Twelve.”
2019
Nelson announces that young missionaries can communicate with family each week, but he asks that calls be limited to 60 seconds or less each to avoid running up the church’s “outrageously expensive monthly phone bill.”
Wendy Nelson reveals that her husband reaches for a lighted pen and a notebook when he receives revelations during the overnight hours. She admits that Nelson usually tells her to “go to the kitchen and make a large batch of homemade doughnuts and I’ll tell you later what I learned tonight.”
Nelson announces that couples who are civilly married can be sealed in the temple immediately thereafter but must be accompanied at all times by same-gender chaperones until the sealing is complete.
Nelson announces that women can serve as sealing and baptismal witnesses. Asked by a Deseret News reporter to comment on the landmark change, Nelson replies, “Aw hell, anyone breathing 8 or older who has been baptized and can see worth a lick can be a witness.”
Nelson announces that 2020 will be a “bicentennial year” with April 2020 general conference “different from any previous conference.”
2020
Nelson fails to wake up during the night in early 2020 when God tries to tell him that a worldwide pandemic is coming.
Nelson issues a new proclamation about some Gospel topic at the “memorable and unforgettable” April 2020 general conference attended by no regular church members.
Church members immediately forget that Nelson issued a new proclamation at the April 2020 general conference. (In fact, as of September 30, 2025, not a single Deznatter has demanded that the proclamation be canonized at general conference and made the topic of a temple recommend question.)
Church leaders announce that the Ensign magazine has been renamed The Thinking Has Been Done.
2021
Church leaders announce that the Minerva Teichert murals in Manti Temple will be “ripped from the temple walls. burned, and buried in a big ol’ hole.”
Admitting that they “gave a half-hearted prayer and failed to remain on their knees listening for an answer” and that they “received thousands of emails from ‘T.O.ed members,” church leaders announce that the murals in the Manti Temple will be moved to decorate the walls of the Provo Temple.
Church leaders announce that the Saturday evening session of general conference will be discontinued because “all sessions of general conference are now available to anyone who desires to watch or listen.”
Church leaders announce that the Saturday evening session of general conference will continue because “after additional study and prayer, we have felt impressed to continue to hold the Saturday evening session of general conference, albeit in a different format than in the past” and “the reason we gave last month was irrelevant.”
Nelson announces that the Provo Temple will be demolished and replaced with a temple featuring a “classical design.” (He does not comment on the fate of the Teichert murals recently moved from the Manti Temple to the walls of the Provo Temple.
Church leaders announce that “tithing settlement” has been renamed “tithing pay-up and shakedown.”
2023
Explaining that they have better things to do than micromanaging every single ward and stake creation and boundary adjustment, Church leaders announce that stake leaders can “use any flipping numbers they feel like in splitting and creating wards and stakes.”
2024
The LDS Church and the Community of Christ announce that they have reached an agreement in which the LDS Church will receive the Kirtland Temple in exchange for Dieter Uchtdorf, City Creek Mall, and cash.
Nelson announces that Snoop Dogg is the new voice of “Music and the Spoken Word.”
Church leaders authorize wearing of “Immodest is Hottest” temple garments.
2025
Church leaders announce that the Addiction Recovery Program renamed Healing through the Savior: The Addiction Recovery Program of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints: A Thirty-Step Program Requiring Absolution by Bishops and Commitment of Miracle of Forgiveness to Memory.
Church announces that the Provo Missionary Training Center’s cafeteria food will be reformulated to be 100 percent free of saltpeter.
Something rattled him akin to Gemli. I wonder what it was?
There was not a trace of the Spirit present in that discussion, and it took me easily twenty or thirty minutes before I could get myself fully into a frame of mind that would allow me to enjoy the pageant.
Announced over 200 new temples and accelerated the pace of temple construction and accessibility.
Home centered church using Come Follow Me program and the two-hour block.
Greater focus on Jesus Christ.
Promoting racial understanding and outreach, including a partnership and substantial donation to the NAACP.
Annual summaries of Church humanitarian efforts became standard, and global initiatives to support women and children were launched under his direction.
Consolidated and restructured priesthood quorums and organizations for both adults and children.
Women were given more active roles in the church, such as serving as official witnesses for baptisms and temple sealings, signifying a notable administrative and cultural shift towards gender inclusivity.
Setting a global standard allowing civil marriage followed by temple sealing without a mandatory waiting period.
I figured we ought to give him a bit more credit.
Regards,
MG
Greater focus on Christ? I would say the focus on Christ has been pretty all encompassing for decades now. Still, it is a good list.
"He disturbs the laws of his country, he forces himself upon women, and he puts men to death without trial.” ~Otanes on the monarch, Herodotus Histories 3.80.
