As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
I had a subnatural experience after reading the Book of Mormon. I woke up an hour later.
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
When I left for campus today the kitchen sink was over piled with dirty dishes and the garbage and recycling hadn't been taken out.
When I came home all the dishes were washed, put away, the garbage and recycling cleared out AND the kitchen floor had been scrubbed.
AND NO BODY WAS HOME.
When I came home all the dishes were washed, put away, the garbage and recycling cleared out AND the kitchen floor had been scrubbed.
AND NO BODY WAS HOME.
Last edited by Anonymous on Mon Mar 19, 2012 10:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
From the Ernest L. Wilkinson Diaries: "ELW dreams he's spattered w/ grease. Hundreds steal his greasy pants."
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
Chap wrote:moksha wrote: ...
I have experienced Ouija boards spelling out answers in an unknown language.
Think about that, people.
This is one subtle little penguin.
Well my Ouija boards spells out the questions too, and in a different unknown language! He must have an older model.
Oh and I went to a 7-11 today and it was open!!!!
"Any over-ritualized religion since the dawn of time can make its priests say yes, we know, it is rotten, and hard luck, but just do as we say, keep at the ritual, stick it out, give us your money and you'll end up with the angels in heaven for evermore."
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
One time a guy cut me off on the highway, so I said a quick imprecatory prayer, and a couple miles down the road he got into a collision. Thanks God of Petty Revenge, you've always been my favorite.
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
This one time, I couldn't reach my wife by phone and really needed to speak to her about a minor emergency at the house. I thought about how I could get in touch with her or who she might be with and started making calls. I even tried to will her to call me after asking elohim to help out.
I never got in touch with her and she came home 2 hours later, well after the emergency was over. We talked about it then....
I never got in touch with her and she came home 2 hours later, well after the emergency was over. We talked about it then....
"your reasoning that children should be experimented upon to justify a political agenda..is tantamount to the Nazi justification for experimenting on human beings."-SUBgenius on gay parents
"I've stated over and over again on this forum and fully accept that I'm a bigot..." - ldsfaqs
"I've stated over and over again on this forum and fully accept that I'm a bigot..." - ldsfaqs
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
I dropped buttered toast on the floor. It landed butter side up.
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
Morley wrote:I dropped buttered toast on the floor. It landed butter side up.
Of course you know what that means.
You buttered the wrong side!!!!
"Any over-ritualized religion since the dawn of time can make its priests say yes, we know, it is rotten, and hard luck, but just do as we say, keep at the ritual, stick it out, give us your money and you'll end up with the angels in heaven for evermore."
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
This morning I had to take a huge dump. I took a religion book in for reading material. A few minutes later I flushed the toilet. I'm sure angels were rejoicing.
Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
Last night I dreamed that Michael Shermer became a born-again Christian, and a fanatical door-to-door evangelist. Then I woke up and realised it was only a dream.
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Re: As An Alternative To Supernatural Experiences........
schreech wrote:This one time, I couldn't reach my wife by phone and really needed to speak to her about a minor emergency at the house...
Fill it with scrubbed dishes, pour a smidgen of dishwasher soap into its dedicated reservoir, and turn the knob until you hear a weird noise.
Problem solved.