Hi Ceeboo,
Sorry I didn't mean to gloss over this question. I thought I might have addressed it generally with my other comments. But I'll look at it more specifically.
Say your wife cheated on you.
You are furious, scared, disappointed, and many other things.
Are these things not rooted in personal and deep hurt, pain, disappointment, fear?
Yes. I think all of the above would be included in how I felt. Unless it was a girl-girl thing. Then I'd probably be mostly disappointed that I wasn't asked to be part of it...

Maybe that is a valid difference?
Ceeboo wrote:Honor,
What about the "wife cheated on you" post that I gave you?
Would you be willing to offer your answers? (If not that's okay too)
Do you think it would matter/change what one might find below the surface if someone was an atheist or a believer in a God?
Peace,
Ceeboo
I don't think it would change what a person felt.
I do think some people might be more inclined to forgive if they had a sense this was the right thing to do. In some cases, I think religion would aid in this. In others it might make it more difficult. I've known Mormons who got divorced over porn. That blows me away, to be honest. I've known a few swingers, too. Not sure they were particularly religious and they had a very different idea of what it meant to cheat than your or maybe I have. Maybe.
Again, I think people are too complex to break out neatly along lines of theist/atheist on this. I'm more inclined to think a person who views us as frail and prone to make mistakes might be more inclined to forgive than someone who focuses on feelings of betrayal, anger, and pain. I think some atheists could find valid reasons for moving past such an event while some won't. Likewise with theists.
Not sure if that answers your question or not.