Problematic John Dehlin, a short list

[Kishkumen]

Indeed, I still feel like there are missing facts. As always.

So RFM, do you have a topic for next week's Mormonism Live? Actually, unless there are more facts on this, it's a becoming a bit of damp squib.

Yes, there are missing facts. I think John did like, unlike, and relike some photos and I believe this made the accuser uncomfortable. My opinion about the wise course of action after that is as follows:

A private confrontation undertaken with a moderated emotional tone.

If that does not work, and said person, after having been appropriately blocked, still finds ways of harassing you, contact the spouse and express your concern.

I still haven't reached the point of taking this to a public venue.

The spouse gets short with you and accuses you of being the problem. The problem does not stop and you are being harassed.

Contact Facebook. Law enforcement.

At some point, if the problem continues, you will likely lose it and start fighting back on the person's social media platforms.

And at that point, I would say the stalker probably had it coming.

[dastardly stem]

John Dehlin, in part, reacting to a woman who says she felt uncomfortable with him liking her swimming suit photo op gallery:

As I am the continual target of smears and slander and defamtion and death threats because of the work I do - and by my and kids get to be in the midd of this daily....YAY!!!!...the only way I can survive these days is by moderating and banning haters and spammers on social media

Further into the rant, he complains (as it appears this lady simply responded to his request on Facebook):

I 10,000% reject their tactic of raising this issue in my workplace, with an intent to smear me in front of my community, and with a brigade of other haters piling on. That's just evil in my view....

They are hurting me.

They are hurting the cause that I love and have literally given my life to....

He continues, switching from talking to someone else to talking, apparently to this lady:

And do you treat all your friends this way...publicly surprise-shaming them for innocent, honest mistakes....who has literally dedicated his life to helping you and people like you.

I, for one, do not want to live in the world you are creating...

Is this a flare for the dramatic, or is it something more problematic than that? I'm not expert on such evaluations, but....

[Kishkumen]

Could be one, the other, or both.

[Dr Exiled]

Dehlin sure doesn't disappoint as far as being the topic of conversation. I agree with those who said he was incredibly stupid to like somebody else's wife's bikini photos. For your wife's sake, don't do it, or like it in private at least. What's next? Dehlin rubs up against a woman at one of his conferences and he may have been semi-excited at the time?

That letter he wrote was a bit much, too. Please John, stop using victimhood as a weapon. Who cares that you are afraid of beer. For heaven's sake, that makes you look disingenuous.

[dastardly stem]

Could be one, the other, or both.

Whatever the case, I'm tired of seeing him acting the victim. Much like the Rosebud situation he could have settled this from the start--apologize, admit the failure, let the story fit in with his request to identify the problems men do and move on. His over-reaction is kind of eye opening. It's stupid. He obviously attempted to flirt with her, thinking he held some sort of license.

Move on, bro. Stop...you aren't doing yourself favors. Then again, he has followers for a reason...so what do I know?

[pistolero]

Dehlin sure doesn't disappoint

Someone should probably get the discussdehlin.com domain name snapped up pretty quick, guaranteed traffic. You could make millions just off the ads alone.

[dastardly stem]

Dehlin sure doesn't disappoint as far as being the topic of conversation. I agree with those who said he was incredibly stupid to like somebody else's wife's bikini photos. For your wife's sake, don't do it, or like it in private at least. What's next? Dehlin rubs up against a woman at one of his conferences and he may have been semi-excited at the time?

That letter he wrote was a bit much, too. Please John, stop using victimhood as a weapon. Who cares that you are afraid of beer. For heaven's sake, that makes you look disingenuous.

Yes.

[consiglieri]

Thinking on this again...what was with his whiney many page complaint about this whole event if he liked one of her photos, and that photo was nothing in the realm of sexy? I thought he was over-reacting before...now I'm thinking over-reacting is an extreme understatement.

I don't think Consig has quite a handle on it yet. I did not say the behaviour was limited to Facebook.

I don’t care what you say, Meadowchick!

You don’t know anything.

You are not in a position to give us any information.

Stop passing on hearsay.

Present the witness or knock off this ridiculous exercise.

For the love of God!

[Lem]

The comments from consiglieri and Kishkumen have been extremely revealing. It is people like these two that make it so difficult to come forward when something has happened.

Between the comments like 'mental,' 'are you unhinged', 'she's losing it', 'serious things happened today how dare you have a problem,' the 12 single sentence paragraphs mocking the person while simultaneously stating they don't know the person, the poster who suggested this is trivial but still made the effort to look up a pic and determine if it was actually "sexy" or not, the one who stated it was her fault for doing the "crap" necessary to notice excessive liking but won't acknowledge that someone may legitimately feel uncomfortable, the "you don't know anything" while NEVER applying a similar standard to his own posts, all while defending their abuse by saying they think Dehhlin could behave better--but not actually applying the same rigid standards to him that they have used to trash women, etc. , this thread is a perfect example of the crap people face when trying to come forward about something.

Kish, you stated recently that you think you have interacted well with women online. Let me add to your information--no, you haven't. You absolutely have NOT. And consig, wow. I would never have thought this before this week, but you're a pig.

On the other hand, other posters such as Doc Cam, dastardly stem, Dr. exiled and others have made some great, rational comments. Thank you. It has been an enlightening week here. I'm pretty sure I understand why various well known women from MD's past have for the most part left this forum.

[consiglieri]

You've got me there. That's the thing with many accusations and lynch mobs. At a certain point they just need to vent all that righteous anger, so the truth really doesn't matter. That's why I think so highly of threads like this one.

Indeed, I still feel like there are missing facts. As always.

So RFM, do you have a topic for next week's Mormonism Live? Actually, unless there are more facts on this, it's a becoming a bit of damp squib.

Ah, but I have the picture!

I could breathlessly reveal it to the world.

But I don’t think people would pay to see it.

Not exactly the Eighth Wonder of the World, if you know what I mean.

Is this the face that launched a thousand ships.
And burnt the topless towers of Illium?




Probably not